This is my norm

I’ve been working on this post for a while now in my head and have to get it down before they are 3 years old. 

July 16, 2014

BJ and I decided that for the night before delivery day we would stay down in Houston closer to the hotel, since we knew we had to wake up really early to be there for our 8:45am surgery. We packed up the girls and took them to the grandparents and as we started our hour drive my body decided to jump in on the excitement and labor began. I had been having contractions for months so this was nothing new. As we got further down the road they came closer and closer together until it got to about 4 minutes a part. We debated whether to go on to the hospital but we decided to go ahead and check in to the hotel and see if they died down and try to rest before the big day. We ordered food and I took a bath to see if that would calm my body down. Finally around 1 I was able to relax and fall asleep. 

We woke up really early around 5 and got ready for our boys big day. I was so worked up and nervous about the surgery and the epidural and the outcome of delivery. With my other pregnancies, Hayden was natural and I had an epidural during the hardest part of labor, Pres and Ella I had an emergency C-section and had my spinal block with no labor and it was awful. I cried the entire time and it was very painful. So needless to say I was not happy about having to have another C-section (thank you Rivan, who refused to remain head down and eliminated my option of a VBAC) and another spinal/epidural. 

We arrived at the hospital and they started prepping me for surgery. Tons of paperwork, even though I had come two days prior and done my pre-op labs and paperwork. Then they tried to find a vein for my IV and failed 4 times. Finally they brought in a wonderful nurse who hit the target the first time. My dr was assisting on another emergent case as my surgery time rolled around so we were bumped. Family and friends arrived and we were able to spend time with them briefly as well as the girls. I was really nervous to see them that morning because I was afraid I would lose it in front of them , and I didn’t want them to be worried. I did fine and we were nearly about to roll out of the room, when BJ stood up and nearly collapsed from back pain. I felt so bad for him to have to deal with that right in the middle of everything else. 

My anxiety continued to build as they finally said it was our turn. I prayed that the boys would be able to come to my room with me, avoid NICU and be healthy and then ultimately be discharged together and come home when I did. I was dreading the epidural even more than the surgery. I know that sounds weird but its true. 

As we rolled down the hall, my mom spotted me and called to me and that’s all it took. I lost it, tears were rolling and I couldn’t even look at her. BJ then had to stop and the nurse continued with me to the operating room as I sobbed all the way.  All the nurses that saw me as I passed looked so concerned so I said “Oh these are happy tears”. I’m not sure that was totally true but they weren’t tears of sadness. 

So I arrived in the OR and they told me that the anesthesiologist for the day was the best one. He was so nice and made a joke as he began. I told him of my extreme fear of needles and he said he would be like a butterfly and I wouldn’t even notice. I have to say that between his expertise in epidurals and my amazing nurse talking me through, I made it. No tears, no excessive pain. I was so relieved. Then the party started 🙂 My doctor came in, everyone was laughing and joking around. Talking to me and I totally relaxed. BJ was able to join me at that point. 
He is not good under these types of situations. He absolutely hates blood and surgery type things and usually gets very pale and wants to see as little as possible. I really wanted to get pictures of the birth though and he was amazing. He actually stood up from the drape and took some great photos of the boys arrivals. He didn’t turn pale or lightheaded and I was so proud of him. 

Liam Boardman was born at 10:21am weighing 6lbs 15oz and measuring 19 inches. I heard him start crying and I was so happy. (Preslyn and Ella didn’t cry in the operating room and were rushed out so quickly to be intubated) I just lay their listening to his cries and thanking God for healthy lungs. Then at 10:23am Rivan Dash (sounds like ribbon, but with a V) was born. He was 6lbs. 5 oz and measured 17 inches. He was crying too and had a very different cry from his brother. I could hear them crying in intervals and it was the most amazing sound ever! I remember saying “I’m not pregnant anymore!!!!!” and being so relieved and excited that that phase had come to an end. 

BJ went over to take pictures and be with the boys and I had my phone with me and posted on FB that they were here. It helped me take my mind off the fact that they were still sewing me up and working on me. I kept getting really lightheaded and they were having to adjust my epidural pretty frequently to make me comfortable but alert. 


Finally they brought the boys over to me. Which was also something I prayed for. I wasn’t able to hold or see the girls in the OR at all and then it was days later til I could hold them at all. It was so wonderful when they put them on me and I just wanted to stare at them and figure out who they were and what they looked like. 

Then they took them to NICU because they both were having premature lung disease. Basically they had too much fluid in their lungs and during delivery, since it was a Csection and happens much faster than natural delivery, they were unable to get all the fluid out. So Rivan had the hardest time and they had to work on him for 2 minutes after delivery. I’m so thankful for great doctors and nurses who took great care of the boys as they arrived. 

I was placed in recovery for about 45 minutes and it was great to have had my phone because I told BJ to go be with family and friends that had taken time out of their day to come, so I was able to read text messages from everyone and see the posts roll in on FB. 

I wish I could have seen the girls faces as they met their brothers, but I had the next best thing. Our great friend came and captured the whole morning. These photos are priceless to me. So much emotion on the every ones faces that I am so thankful to have captured on film. Thank you Aaron Tharpe for these memories you captured.